May 01st, 2019

Not long ago, Tim and I were at a fair sized gathering of fun and interesting people.  We were having a perfectly lovely time talking, laughing, eating, y'know, the usual stuff that happens when a group of people get together. And then one man threw out the following question:

"If you didn't know how old you were, how old would you be?"

Interesting question.  So if somehow, I had zero point of reference and nobody ever told me my age or what the actual date of my birth was, how old would I think I was?  Hmmmm.  Interesting question.  For me,  I think it depends completely on the day. I feel differently from day to day. Doesn't everyone?

I confess that there are days when I believe I'm at least as old as Methuselah.  Days when just getting out of bed feels like  a major accomplishment.  I'm a little cranky, everything hurts and almost everything that needs to be done is a little more effort than I really want to expend.

And then there are days when I'm goofy and silly and bouncing around filled with all sorts of pent up energy.  On those days, I think maybe I'm about 5 years old.  I start out by having cookies for breakfast, ice cream for lunch and potato chips for dinner.  I want a nap around 3 o'clock and I'm in bed by 8.

Other times I'm probably a young adult...20's or so.  I'm optimistic, idealistic and full of purposeful energy. I eat very healthfully, work out without complaining about it and stay up very late at night.  On those days, I'm kind of fun and I want to go new places and try new things. I am fearless on those days!

But then, that is probably balanced by  the days I am my actual age.   I get everything done that needs to be done, but sometimes I have to force myself a tiny bit.  I have to remind myself every day to not get comfortable in my little "rut" and to be more adventurous.  I'm happy most of the time  but when I read the newspaper sometimes I get a little angry or worse, sad.  It's hard to keep up with everything new in technology though I try.  And I no longer have any idea who is singing on the radio in the car when it's set to a popular music station.

If I wasn't looking in the mirror and had to average it all out, probably most of the time I'd assume that I was somewhere in my 40's.  

That's not really so bad.  The decade of my forties was a good time in my life.  Tim and I got married the year I turned 40. And in that decade, we bought a house, fixed it up, went on some awesome trips and created great memories with the boys. Now that I think about it, all of our parents were still alive in that decade too.

But would I want to go back and do it again?  Nope.  Not a chance.

You know those movies, Freaky Friday and Back to the Future where people have an opportunity to relive the past in one way or another?  I have no desire at all to do it all over again.  I'm all about moving forward.  I may feel in my 40's but  I'm very happy where I truly am now.  It took 65 years to get here and every single experience I've had, every person I've  met, every thing I've done, every place I've gone is what created this moment right now.  And this moment right now is pretty darned good.

​So..I ask you!  If you didn't know how old you were, how old would you be?