Here's a sad truth. This was the part in my hair yesterday morning. I remember thinking that it was a darned good thing I had a hair appointment later that day. And I said as much (via text) to my friend Marsha. I think I said something about how "sparkly" I'm getting. She said, in return, and I am quoting here, " Oh Please.....I am dazzling with all of my sparkle". And I immediately fell in love with that idea. We aren't going grey, we are becoming dazzling!
Growing up, most of the women I knew just let their hair go grey or silver or white or whatever colour it decided to be whenever it decided to do it. The hair was in charge. And while they weren't happy about it, it was what it was. I suspect that back then, the nonaddressed greys were primarily because hair colour wasn't as good as it is now. It sort of looked crayoned on. It absolutely did not ever look real or natural. Despite what secrets Miss Clairol claimed to have kept.
Oh some older ladies with those super tight curly permed hairdo's got that funny blue rinse done, but otherwise, most people didn't colour their hair. Or if they did, they didn't talk about it. And in fact, within some groups, women who coloured their hair were looked down upon. Like ear piercings and bright red nail polish, dangling earrings and open toed patent leather shoes, it was something that "good girls" didn't do.
Well it turns out that, given a little time, some better science and a little more latitude in the social attitudes, that good girls do colour their hair. And what's more at this point, they aren't shy at all about letting people know. Green Hair, Blue Hair, Unicorn Hair...hard to mistake for natural colour but isn't it fun!
My hair started out in life to be blonde. Blondie blonde. No mistake about it, blonde. Joy's hair was even lighter. Her hair was more white then blonde. It was eye catching. And my hair stayed some shade of blonde even through college. I vaguely recall some fledgling poet behind me in a literature class whispering to me that my hair was "spun honey gold". I don't recall what my response was, if I said anything at all. The point is I had blonde hair.
Until I had children. With each child my hair became darker until it was unmistakably dark brown. There is absolutely nothing wrong with dark brown hair. Or any other colour of hair. But it was strangely hard to wrap my brain around it. In group photos I would spot someone who sort of looked like me, but was a brunette. And it would take a second, "oh yeah, that's me now". I tried (and failed) to just adapt to the dark brown hair. But somehow, I just never could. And it's strange that it bothered me so much, because in general I am exceedingly adaptable to change. Just not that particular one.
So eventually I got very brave, and bought some sort of home hair colour product and began the hair colour dance. The initial results were fine. My hair was lighter. If not blonde then at least light brown. And that was enough. But I wasn't very good at doing home hair colour and at some point I realized than my hair, instead of being some shade of light brown or even dark blonde was actually a bizarre and rather frightening orange. How did I never notice it before? It was baffling but not only did I not noticed but clearly everyone else was too polite to say so. The time had clearly come to cede to the ministrations of the professionals.
What a relief to not have to worry about doing it myself anymore. I had regularly scheduled appointments and all was good in the hair colour world until.....my hairdresser who was also a wonderful friend, moved on to other things in her life and I was handed off to a different hairdresser who had a completely different vision of how I should look. And again and again and repeat. I don't know if I didn't care about how my hair looked or if I just wasn't paying attention but by the time we moved to Colorado, my hair was almost white blonde. Too blonde. Way too blonde. AND way too fried. My hair was crispy from processing.
Shortly after arriving in Colorado I found a new hairdresser and we had a heart-to-heart talk. She explained that her first concern was getting my hair healthy again. I agreed. She asked me what my vision was. I explained how I felt about myself when I had dark hair but mostly I had only 3 rules. My hair was never too look like a helmet, a hat or a wig. Otherwise, she was given carte blanche. Do as you please I said. And once she realized that I was serious, that's exactly what she did.
During my time in Colorado my hair was every shade of red, every shade of blonde, every shade of brown you can imagine. But it also got a whole lot healthier. So with regard to hair colour/health/cut, in Colorado, things went very well.
And then we moved to Florida. It took a little time to find someone who "gets" me. But I finally did. And by the time I did I realized how VERY sparkly my hair had become. Although as I recall it was while we were still in Colorado that it first came to my attention. It was a little girl who lived across the street. She ran up to me and leapt into my arms. I swung her high up in the air and on the way back down, she patted my hair and said to me, "I just love your hair Miss Sam. It's all sparkly". Awwwwww. How sweet :) I mean that sincerely. I'd rather be thought of as sparkly than just old. It was just a few strands here and there but it was unmistakable. And naturally the sparkliness of my hair has not gone away. In fact, I believe it has accelerated.
Occasionally now I toy with the idea of just letting my hair be what it is. When I was at the hairdresser yesterday, I asked my hairdresser about it. She hmmed a bit and parted my hair here and there to see what all of the various roots layers looked like and then declared that the only sparkly bits are at the top. It's my call entirely but in her opinion, I would be sparkly only on the top for quite some time yet.
So I guess I am not yet ready to throw in the towel and call it quits on the colour. And if I'm not, I'm not. No reason required. This is the part in my hair now.
So be it. Some day, may be one day soon, I will say, to heck with it. Let my hair be what it is. Yesterday wasn't the day. But it will happen. Probably sooner rather than later.
And then I too can be dazzling! I'm kind of excited about it!
Yup, this is me. Some people said, "Sam, you should write a Blog". "Well, there's a thought", I thought to myself. And so here it is.