I made a mess.
It wasn't intentional but that doesn't change the fact that a mess was made and I am the guilty party. It's not the first time I've made a mess and I'm sure it won't be the last. And since one of the first rules I made in the household starting from when the boys were little was, "If you mess it up, you clean it up" that meant that I had to clean it up. Okay.
It was hot sauce. I was making chili and as per usual I was doing too many things at once and therefore flying around the kitchen like a ladybug. I grabbed the brand new bottle of hot sauce off the panty shelf and, as I was walking back out of the pantry, I was also removing that bizarre plastic "safety sleeve" at the same time as I was just giving it a good shake (as I always do with hot sauce in case the ingredients have separated a little). Okay lets review I am walking, I am removing and I am shaking. Got it? To my great surprise the next thing I saw was the lid flying off and hot sauce flinging itself everywhere. Polka dots of hot sauce were on the walls, the floors, the doors, the cabinets, the shelves and some of the other items in the pantry.
I don't know what you do in this situation but I nearly always have the same two part response. First I stand completely still, in shock I suppose, then all the marbles in my head fall into the proper holes and I start laughing. In this particular case, I laughed until I had tears in my eyes. I continued laughing while I cleaned and cleaned and cleaned. Later, while eating the above mentioned chili, Tim went to refill his water glass. When he returned he asked, "Why is the floor sticky?" and I started laughing again.
I don't know why I find it so funny. I guess I have a strange sense of humour. I've been told that far too many times to count so I suppose it's true. But nothing is funnier to me that real life. And when things surprise me, that is my go-to response, laughter.
There was the situation involving me and a brand new, full half-gallon of orange juice. I was struggling with that little pull tab that unlocks the plastic cap. I had the orange juice jug standing on the counter and I held it in place with one hand as I pulled and pulled at the lock tab. The doggone thing still wasn't coming off. Finally I yanked with all my tiny might! The lock tab came off, the cap came off and in fact the entire half-gallon of orange juice came right off the counter and flew through the air, juice spewing as it tumbled, almost gracefully, in an arc and came to land with a gurgle and a clatter on the floor. I stood stunned for a moment and then the laughter began. I nearly wet my pants laughing at that one.
The list goes on and on and on. I am an accident waiting to happen, apparently. But it's not just me that accidentally makes messes y'know. It can happen to anyone!
One of my adorable daughters-in-law was helping me clean up after dinner one night. Together, very companionably, we chatted and cleaned, loading the dishwasher, clearing the table, wiping down counters and stove tops and packing up the leftovers. She moved to put the now very full left-over container in the refrigerator and somehow the entire thing slipped out of her hands and boom, spaghetti and red sauce everywhere. The fridge, the floor, the walls and her. She turned and looked at me in shock, hands still poised in front of her as if she were still holding the container. I saw little tears forming in her eyes as she said, 'I am so so sorry! I will clean it up" My laughter nearly drown her out. I couldn't even talk I laughed so hard. Laughter must be contagious I guess, because then she started laughing and together we wiped that mess up, giggling all the while.
When I first relayed the story of my most recent mess, so many people suggested that they would not have laughed about it but perhaps cussed a bit. I am so sorry to hear that because the laugh response is definitely a happier one. if you make a mess you are going to have to clean it up anyway, right?. If I laugh while I'm cleaning, when I'm done I'm in a good mood. If I cuss while I'm cleaning, I'm in a bad mood. I'd rather be in a good mood.
So the new addendum to the house rule is: If you mess it up, clean it up but giggle as you go. I think that is a good rule.
Yup, this is me. Some people said, "Sam, you should write a Blog". "Well, there's a thought", I thought to myself. And so here it is.