May 06th, 2026

Well dang it all. I missed posting on my usual Tuesday once again. I'm so sorry. I've always thought of myself as a person that you can count upon.  If I say I'm going to do something, I, by gosh, do it!  And for most of my life that's just been the way that I operated. For everything in my life, even the blogpost. Every Tuesday and every Friday, like clockwork, I produced a blogpost.  I took that Tuesday/Friday deadline seriously. Like Dead Seriously. (terrible pun, sorry)

I prefer my life to be tidy.  I like knowing ahead, planning,  having life well arranged.  This is both literal and figurative. I know where every item of mine in this house is.  If you asked me if we had, oatmeal for example, I could tell you precisely where it is in the panty.  Could you borrow a pair of scissors, you ask? I can tell you exactly where to find them (and please replace them in the exact same place, thank you)  I even know where every item of clothing that I own is and can find it In The Dark. Ok that's maybe a little scary but it's true.   Same goes with my personal calendar of events.  It's not rigid, but it is neat and clean.  I've always said that I'm open to being spontaneous as long as it's well planned (heh)

This extended into life as well.  If I say I'm working on Monday and Wednesday, then you know exactly where I will be, appropriately dressed, with a smile on my face and ready to go on those days.   On the days I designated as laundry days, that's what I'm doing, laundry.  I clean on cleaning days, shop on shopping days, post blog on blog posting days, etc. etc. etc. It's been a pretty good balance of doing the things I am obligated to do and doing the things that I want to do.

But somehow, lately, my calendar seems to be getting away from me, it's a little out of control My list of gotta-do's is getting in the way of my list of wanna-do's.  I hate when that happens.  And it's not a matter of me suddenly being scattered and unorganized at all.  It's also not that I have recently decided to be cavalier about missing an, admittedly, self-imposed, goal.   

As always there are reasons. Not as excuses but as genuine explanations.

And, as per usual, it's not just one thing, it's multiple things, layers of things, all legitimate but still .....    For example:  1) We are very short handed at the museum so I'm picking up extra shifts.  Every moment I spend there, something isn't getting done here.  Just a fact. 2) Medical Appointments.  I don't know about where you live, but where we live securing a doctor appointment is a delicate thing.  There are so many people vying for the doctor's time that there is no picking and choosing days and times, you take what you get and work the rest of your life around it.    3) Projects.  Lately we seem to be taking on a lot of home projects of one sort of another and those are always more time consuming than anticipated and  4)  Doggone it, I hate to admit it, but I'm tired.  I wear out faster than I used to and, the big and, the most important and, nowadays I'm willing to admit it and then sit down.

That's new to me.  I feel like I spent most of my life tired but I didn't have time to sit down.  Sitting down felt like an indulgence that I couldn't afford. I just pushed through, kept going, kept swinging no matter what.  Just took a deep breath, smiled and moved forward.  I never caught up but, I reasoned, at least I wasn't falling too far behind.   YEARS ago,  when I was in what is now called middle school, I briefly ran track. I was strictly a distance running because what I lacked in speed, I had in stamina.  I made sure I had just enough umph left inside me for that final kick of energy at the end, but mostly I just kept moving forward.  The coach told us that " no matter how tired we thought we were,  we could always take one more step. Everyone  has it in them to pull it together to take one more step. And the one more, and one more and before you know it, you have made it through to the end".

I guess I took that to heart and used it in my everyday life. It served me well.  I did make it through every day and everything that needed to be done, somehow got done both in my professional life and in my home life. I just kept taking that one more step rather than giving in and sitting down.

And then I retired.  I took me quite awhile to adapt to being retired.  I kept pushing and organizing and prioritizing (then endlessly reprioritizing) my day, every day just like I did when I was working full time (sometimes also working a second, part time gig as well).  Then one day, when I was so tired that I literally ached from it, to my surprise, I sat down.  During the middle of the afternoon, I sat down.  I picked up a book and sat in a comfortable chair, and it was glorious.  So glorious, in fact, that I almost immediately fell asleep, sitting up in that chair with an unopened book in my lap.  AND the world didn't come to an end.  

Somehow everybody got fed, laundry got done, the house is clean enough and life went on.  It was an epiphany for me.  Why was I still pushing so hard?  Just habit?  Probably.    I began to re-prioritize things a bit.   I remembered not so much what my old coach said (the one more step guy) but more what my old philosophy professor said, "Hey 110 years from now, who will know the difference?"  Brilliant!  

So nowadays, while I still have my preferred getting the laundry done days and my preferred blogpost writing days, if it doesn't happen to happen as I hoped, I forgive myself and move on.  I show up to work on time, I show up to doctor appointments as required, everything that absolutely needs to get done, gets done and some of the things I'd like to happen, actually happen. Some don't. Or at least they didn't yesterday. But it did happen today and it's okay.  Because, when it's not contrary to the things I absolutely have to do from now on, if I need to sit a minute, I'll sit.  If I want to read for awhile, I will read. And if a nap is calling, I will answer.

I will continue to try to post every Tuesday and Friday, but occasionally life, or a really good nap, might get in the way.  And then I'll try to post, instead, the next day.  Because my old philosophy professor was correct, "110 years from now, who will know the difference?"

Have a Great Rest of Your Week!  The plan is to post again on Friday!