August 08th, 2019

Way back in the 1800's somewhere, poet, Henry Wadsworth Longfellow wrote:

"All houses wherein men have lived and died
Are haunted houses"

Nicely said, Mr. Longfellow.  And by the way, I love your name.

Now this is going to sound a little grumpy.  So I apologize in advance if I do not sound like my usual happy smiley self.  I'm wearing my Mom-Hat right now.

That Longfellow poem came to mind recently when I read an article about a couple who bought a haunted house.  Now let me make that absolutely clear.  They specifically bought a house that was already known to be  haunted.  So there was no surprise here. They KNEW that the house had the reputation of being haunted before they purchased it.  And in fact,  they said that the house's reputation was definitely an incentive to the purchase.  

Apparently this couple had an long time interest in the paranormal already so yeah, it makes sense.  This house sounds as if it were custom made for them.  A match made, if not in heaven, then perhaps made somewhere in the supernatural realm right? 

(Even if you pooh-pooh the idea, there are a lot of people who believe in haunted houses.  In a quick check on Amazon I found over one thousand entries for books about haunted houses listed in Non-Fiction alone! )

Anyway, they lived in the house for less than ten years before they felt that they were forced to move out.  Somewhere along the line while they still lived in the house, they even enlisted the help of paranormal investigators to try to evict their non-paying non-corporeal guests to no avail.   Turns out that the house really was haunted.  Or so the family reports.  And - and here was the part that kind of made me say, "what?" - They were not at all happy about the fact that their house was haunted.

I guess imaging  living in a haunted house is nothing like actually living in a haunted house.  Still, this so-called haunting was no surprise to them.  So why were they surprised?

It's like ordering a cup of hot coffee and then complaining because the coffee is hot.  Or ordering a cheeseburger and then getting upset because the burger has cheese on it.  And I'm not even joking a little bit about that.  It really does happen.  Ask anyone who works in a restaurant.

Sometimes people just make me shake my head in disbelief.  I want to ask them, "Are you listening to yourself?  Do you hear what you are saying?".  I have to assume that they are not because nothing else makes any sense.

It's why warning labels are put on every single product that we buy.  "Keep arms and legs clear of the woodchipper while it's working."  Really?  Someone has to tell you that?  It doesn't already just make sense?  Or,  on my sunscreen bottle, "External use only".  Why is it necessary to instruct us about that?  Would you drink sunscreen to prevent a burn?  

My laundry detergent, in all caps, warns me to keep the soap out of my eyes.  Because naturally if they had not told me to, I would be applying it like eyedrops so that I could blink my clothes clean.  I read on the my Spray & Wash bottle to not apply it to my clothes while I am wearing them.  Why would I do that?  I have to be told to not do that?

The mascara I use has a reminder to not use it anymore if it develops an unpleasant odor.  That is kind of a given.  If I uncap it and a stink floats out, it's going right into the waste basket and then probably directly into the outside garbage can.  You don't have to tell me!  The packaging on my foundation make-up says very sternly that if I develop a skin irritation after using it, I should (gasp!) discontinue use!  Shocking idea!

Every time I hear those medication commercials on television where they say, "if you are allergic to (name of medication) do not take (name of medication)".  What?  If I'm allergic to something I am definitely not exposing myself to it. I don't need to be told not to. That should just be a given.

I know, I know, the warning labels are on there to protect the companies from litigation.  Well that is just sad too.  Are we really so stupid?  Or are we just not bothering to use our brains?    It's common sense people.  If something is hot, don't touch it.  If it's sharp, be careful with it. If it's poison, do not ingest it.   If something is not meant to be eaten, do not eat it.  

If we keep demanding that other people do our thinking for us, we will forget completely how to think for ourselves (if we haven't already)!!

And if you buy a haunted house because it is a house that is haunted, do not later complain to me that you have a haunted house.  That is just ridiculous.  And by the way 1 + 1 = 2 or is that a shocker to you also?  Sorry that was a little snarky.  But I stand behind my original point.

Oh and by the way, I found a list of 5 things that indicate that you have a haunted house, in case you were wondering about your own:

1. Unexplained Temperature Changes
2. Strange technological glitches
3. Unusual scents such as perfume, tobacco and sulfur
4. Object movement and/or Unidentifiable Sounds
5. Pets making Contact with people you cannot see

If it turns out that you do live in a haunted house and you already knew that it was when you bought it, don't come whining to me about it.  No sympathy here.    Grump grump grump.